On Wednesday I had a client in picking up a check for her injury case. I asked her what were her plans for Thanksgiving. She said cook and ..... I had not quite heard the last word . So I asked again. This time I heard clearly what she said, " Cook and grieve."
I asked what she was grieving. She told me her son had died 2 years ago. She told me that he had committed suicide. She was not sure completely why. But it was obvious she still blamed herself. All I could do was tell her a short " love you" and give her a hug. It didn't seem like much . But it was all I knew what to say or do.
If you have lost someone to suicide, the first thing you should know is that you are not alone. Each year over 34,000 people in the United States die by suicide -- the devastated family and friends they leave behind are known as "survivors." There are millions of survivors who, like you, are trying to cope with this heartbreaking loss.
If the loss was not by suicide but was a traumatic death you can bet your client is having a difficult time. Maybe you could call them this week just to say hi , how are you doing. I know you are busy , but that small little gesture coming from a lawyer can go a long way to letting your client know that the outside world cares and remembers.
Last year I had two cases I was working on involving a wrongful death. This year it's only one . Here's a quote from a mom about the the death of her child:
"One learns to live with the loss, the tragedy, the waste, and the gaping hole in the fabric of one's life. There is no closure, nor would I want one. I want to remember him all my life, vividly: his laughter, the smell of his sneakers under his bed, his moments of joy, his humility, and his integrity."
Even though its been 3 years since the death, the fabric of the family I represent has been shredded and they have not learned to live with the loss. Hopefully I can push this case forward to a resolution. The trial is set. This is but a piece in the puzzle that can help the family move forward. For the survivors to find some joy in life, and not so much pain within pain they need to see justice served . They need to see the wrongdoers take responsibility. Or made to take responsibility.
It makes me a bit sad to write this. You see I don't handle my emotions so well. And I have everything in the world to be thankful for. A great family , wife, children, brother, sisters , parents and friends. I'll make sure today to hug each one and tell them I love them .